people who think i’m attractive:
- no one
If I were a magic wizard I wouldn’t harm people when they pissed me off, I’d just put these really fucked up random curses on them, like every time they saw a school bus they would shit their pants, or every time someone said the word Thursday they would pretend they were a dragon for 20 seconds.
I’m so fucking weird
I’m the nicest rude person you’ll ever meet.
I don’t give a fuck about anything but at the
same time, I care about a lot
I hate everyone but ill always help anyone
I hate myself but I’m completely fabulous.
I need help.
this is the most accurate thing I’ve ever read.
clearly as a teenager i’m not mature enough to drink, smoke, drive or have sex but i am obviously prepared to decide on the career i want to be in for the rest of my life
so basically when you have your period and your lower back hurts it is because your hips are contracting and spreading apart, only slightly, to make room for the release of the blood and linings of your uterus. so basically your body is going through a small and mild labor to push out the dead insides of your uterus. so basically I have gone through labor and basically I don’t want children.
- Employer: So how qualified do you think you are for the job, sir?
- Me: Hella
- Employer: Welcome aboard
sure, money can’t buy you “happiness” but it can buy you a sense of financial security, remove the worry of not being able to feed yourself, remove the fear of losing your house, remove the discomfort of not being able to socialize because you don’t have the money to go out, and also it can buy you the new pokemon game and that’s pretty fucking close